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MomOfTwo

Where to stay if hubby works in Toronto....

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MomOfTwo

Hiya so we are getting close to our end of year lease, in Oakville. Even though beautiful and green, i feel very out of place here, I have not made any friends, which is weird because that was normally the one thing I am good at (maybe the only thing lol), but I just don't seem to see people around lol. We are actually at a point where i am so damn lonely at home with a baby and the baby classes are not helping, that i was considering actually leaving Canada as I don't see how things are gonna change. I was thinking, if I'm gonna be lonely it might as well be in a warmer country :-). Anyways, i was wondering if you could suggest more lively young neighborhoods that is not further out than Oakville (as in commute time for hubby), anywhere in GTA. Missisauga not an option neither is Hamilton or Milton. I am thinking other side of Toronto!! I have a 4 year old in JK so if we move it will be a new school for him and therefor I have to consider this move very carefully as he just got use to his new school but if Momma goes mad, it aint good for the family .

Friendly suggestions would be appreciated....i.e plssss don't tell me I'm a bad mom to up and go my son after only one year...i already know it :-)

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Tracey22

I have friends who live in Stoney Creek. It is a bit further than Oakville but it is a newish community. Factor this into your search: Look for a newer area, and for a property in a cul-de-sac or court. It is amazing to see how at night all the kids come out to play in the court. Then they all go back in at bedtime. The parents are out with the kids chatting.

It is very difficult to find friend sand make friends. north of us also has younger communities since there are newer developments. So maybe look for the newer developments and you will find the younger families.

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Nelline

You're not a bad mom!! You summed it up when you said "if Momma goes mad, it aint good for the family" and that is so true. You have to look after yourself, too, otherwise you cannot nurture those around you.

Sorry I can't help with the "area-advice" but what Tracey said makes loads of sense.

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Linda

Perhaps I am biased, but I like it where I am, north of the Ciy, the Town of Aurora is lovely and there is a good cross-section of housing in every price bracket to suit most plus the GO Train downtown is efficient for transit. A slightly more affordable area north of the City is Stouffville, lots of young families have settled there. Anything further east than the City is without a doubt cheaper,my here are some lovely pockets of housing if you really look carefully but generally speaking it is an area that has served the manufacturing sector, a little more blue collar than white collar if you will.

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Sideline

Mom,

Linda is brilliant at finding those little treasures. It might well be worth your while to arrange a coffee meetup with her. Even though we never made it to Toronto in the end, Linda has helped us immensely in the past and to this day we consider her and hubby very close and dear friends.

Good luck in your search and keep strong and smile. Life has too many problems, we forget to just take a deep breath and smile every so often.

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Linda

You are extremely kind and I thank you for your lovely compliment ! I have corresponded with "Mom" in the past but would be more than willing to assist if she was looking to the north of Toronto, sometimes our journey has a few twists and turns before we find the right path to follow and I have met some of the nicest of people through this Forum, people who have become Canadian "family"! Always available to help those that I can❤️❤️

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Guest

Linda, its folks like you, Sideline, Nelline, Tracey, Ingrid, CathyK, Mary Jane and the many others (my apology if I don’t recognise you by name) that make this forum a valuable immigration info resource for those undertaking this daunting emigration journey. You have our greatest respect for your selfless approach in providing people with information on the journey that awaits them.

MOM, all the best in your search finding a home in Canada where you can hang your heart and call it home!

PS: Linda, you are not being biased, Aurora is a great place to live!

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Linda

Thanks Lawrence, I know how hard those earliest years were when we arrived in Toronto, we knew only one couple who themselves were new to Canada and, together with the help of people who had been here for 20 years and who were willing to assist, made our settling in so much easier. I help where I can and I feel for those folks who arrive and are trying to find their feet. The payback is that you get to meet so many cool peeps and as I say some are like family to us now. Half the battle of deciding where to settle down is knowing what you want and what you budget is, then finding the right resources to make it happen. This is a massive City, more than 8 mill folks in the greater GTA, so finding your little spot in the Sun can take some work.

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Tracey22

How can anyone say you are a bad mom for wanting the best for your kids? Food for thought: my hubby is in a similar position to you. He works from home, and looks after the kids till I get home.he also has not made many friends. It is difficult.

he has his starbucks friends and his deli friends to break the day. Here's the controversial thing: our family doctor put him on antidepressants. He was never before a candidate for chill pills until the immigration. Our doc is an immigrant and she says many physicians understand the toll immigration has on a person. The chill pills have saved our marriage and have saved hubby's relationship with the kids.

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Raquel

Wow Tracey, thank you for sharing something so personal with us! The thing is I am likely to be in your situation when babas come along.... Not sure how we feel about it though! It was refreshing but at the same time shocking for me to read that this is the case (or your case) in Canada.... I guess we have this vision that it's a first world place and everything is "perfect" as society would define perfection!

@ mom.... All my friends have kids, and it is the hardest job in the world!!!! (I sometimes step in, and boy I wonder how moms cope! :)) here's the thing- you to deserve happiness, peace of mind and your sanity! Good luck in your search... Will be thinking of you! ;)

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Jules

Immigration and depression (read: deep clinical depression) can unfortunately go hand in hand for many. My wife went through a severe depression that lasted several years (off and on) after we arrived here. And the lack of sunlight during the long winter definitely aggravated it and no amount of central heating helps. Holidays like Christmas would only make it worse.

I'm by nature a very positive optimistic person and even I have had my days...

The good news is that it does get better. For my wife her ultimate peace came from connecting with a church group who have become an amazing support group to her and she no longer needs the chill pills (btw I love that expression)

I mention the above to let everyone know that emigration isn't always a bed of roses. I also mention the above to remind you that it can get better. When we say it takes time that means it could take years and years.

Edited by Jules

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Tracey22

@Jules - That's the thing. Immigration solves immediate problems associated with the crime, education, political stability of South Africa. But it does bring the hardships of moving to a foreign country, losing friends and being alone. @MomofTwo, if you look back to the early posts of most of the people here, you will find posts about how hard this place is. The key is to push through the early years. it is hard, and you may have to constantly remind yourself of what it was that brought you to Canada.

I have been here for 4 years. The first year was hell. But we managed to push through it. the benefits of being here versus SA are immeasurable. you just have to stick to your guns. Get all the help you can, from church groups to psychologists to social workers.

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MomOfTwo

I will have to go explore i guess.....before i pack up and leave. tx for all the messages.

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